Do you believe in timing? I do and don't. I think that effort needs no perfect timing but the result does.

These days life has become a chore. The future is hazy. Just a couple of years back I used to be this driven and passionate person. Failures used to make me strong and success would satisfy me.

After coming to the United States I started off with the same chutzpah but repeated failures and insignificant successes broke me somewhere. Now life seems like a something where I am putting up a happy face for the people and sometimes to my destiny lest it feels I am ungrateful. I used to be a dreamer. I had my own little fantasies . Now I don't dream anymore. I have nobody who I can share my dreams with.

Sometimes I want to pack my things off and call it a day. Its not that I am scared to take that step on accounts of uncertainty or hardships. But I think what stops me is a hope that I get back the twinkle in my eye and that hop in my walk. What if I don't and I become just like every other woman putting everything else before her happiness. 

Can two people who want different things in life live happily ever. Or is there always compromise and unhappiness with unfulfilled desires? Do they intersect at some point and call it truce?

As of this day I am sitting in this dull colored office with no love and home where I can go back to. What I do have is materialist comfort and technology which connects me to my loved ones. But is that enough? Especially for someone like me who has forgotten what happiness is.